I remember when my kids were babies and every month was something to be celebrated. We took pictures and recorded all of the milestones that they hit in those first few years. Starting march 28th, 2001 every time it is the 28th of any month, I think of Nina. Matthew’s birthday is February 2nd and the 2nd of any month brings thoughts of Matthew.
Today is September 23rd. I now always know when it is the 23rd of each month. Even though I spend most days, having no idea what the date is without looking at the calendar, I always know when it is getting close to the 23rd. I can feel it in my entire body. My jaw begins to clench and my back hurts. My brain goes a million miles an hour and I have trouble holding onto any thought for more than a minute or two. This all happens every 23rd of the month. When the day is here, it is harder to get out of bed. I know that I will see...
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